And Now I Know What a "10" Feels Like

When you're in the hospital, the nurses like to keep tabs on your level of pain or discomfort. They use the universal, "On a scale of 1 to 10... 10 being the worst", method of documenting a patient's pain.

Ten days ago, I finally learned what a "10" really feels like. For reasons still unknown, my beloved, coveted, twice-administered epidural failed to work.

Well, I take that back. It worked for the first several hours and only stopped providing pain relief when I got to eight cm.

Otherwise known as the really hard and painful part.

I can honestly tell you that I have never, EVER experienced that level of pain in my entire life. The sensations that accompany an unmedicated labor and delivery are almost too intense to put into words. And because my epidural worked so flawlessly with my son's delivery, I was completely unprepared for the experience.

No breathing methods to fall back on, no coaching skills for my hubby to recall. Just a lot of praying, panicking and pushing.

I wanted to scream, "TEN! It's a TEN!"

For the first time in my life, I understood the full measure of pain that my body could tolerate.

And then...

It was gone. And there she was - a perfect eight-pound little girl. Screaming, wiggling, wonderfully healthy. So tiny, so beautiful.

The nurses got busy working on her, cleaning her up, discussing numbers and ratings that I am not qualified to understand. I overheard her APGAR scores being discussed from across the room at one point.

"Eight and Nine" they said.

But I wanted to shout, "TEN! She's a TEN!

Sshhhhh.......

Please don't wake me up.

I'm having the most beautiful dream...

Dear Hubby,

In the next 48 hours, we will be spending some close, personal time together.

And while I consider you one of the smartest, most thoughtful of husbands, I feel like I need to take a moment to give you the following pointers on how the next few days need to go down.

The labor & delivery room we'll be checking in to is so very nice. It's spacious and clean, and it has a big television and DVD player for our enjoyment.

Unfortunately, the DVD player is incompatible with movies that star any of the following actors: Steven Segal, Chuck Norris, Jackie Chan, or any of the last seven guys who've played James Bond.

In addition, I want to give you a heads up that you will, at no time, have charge over the remote control for the t.v. Unfortunately, the risk is just too high that you may stumble upon programming that features Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity or Bill O'Reilly. New studies have shown a direct correlation between post-partum insanity and political talk shows, and that's just not a risk I'll be willing to take. You know, for the sake of our family.

You'll be pleased to know that the hospital provides free wi-fi for your computer. So feel free to bring the laptop with you for entertainment. I did read somewhere that fantasty football sites are unavailable while women are laboring. So sorry.

I've taken the liberty of loading our ipod with a bunch of new songs that I think you'll enjoy. If for some reason, however, you find that several of your old favorites (like all those songs they play at football games to hype everyone up) have gone missing, I assure you that I know nothing about that. Believe me, though... you'll find Fernando Ortega's soothing rendition of "Be Thou My Vision" just as thrilling as the Black-Eyed Peas promise that "Tonight's Gonna Be a Good, Good Night!"

Throughout the course of the night, I may find the opportunity to get some sleep. If this phenomenon occurs, please do nothing to disturb the few precious moments of rest. Even if I am snoring as loud as a freight train and other hospital patients are peering into the room to see what in the world could be making that kind of noise, I would advise you to just close your eyes and insert some ear plugs.

And one last thing, as the nurses ask me for my entire medical history, including my current weight, just go ahead and keep those ear plugs securely fastened.

I know that this is a lot of information to take in. I do not wish to take anything away from the excitement you're feeling about the impending arrival of our newest family member.

But please know this... by Thursday afternoon it'll all be worth the inconveniences (and possible Project Runway marathons) you'll be subjected to.

Because I think you're about to fall madly in love with one precious little girl. And her mommy's about to fall madly in love with you all over again.

Love,
Me

FRUIT

Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

About two years ago, I was driving in my car and praying. It must have been around this same time of year. The beginning of Fall and the start of a new school year always put my mind in a position of resolve. Kinda like January 1 does for most people. What do I want the year to look like? What disciplines do I want to focus on? What greater purpose will my life serve this year, etc.?

And while praying, I felt impressed to ask God to work on bringing out the Fruit of His Spirit within me. After all, I have known Jesus as my Savior since I was 9 years old.

But have I, in the subsequent years, allowed Him room to develop the nine qualities listed in Galatians that are the Fruit (or evidence) of the Holy Spirit living inside of me?

Within weeks of that prayer, and by no coincidence, I was asked to develop a curriculum for the childcare program at our MOPS meetings. It just so happened that we would be meeting as a group nine times during the course of the month. I was charged with creating nine lessons geared toward 4-5 yr old children. Hmmm.... Perhaps the nine qualities of the Fruit of the Spirit?

So, I began working on the lessons and praying that God would work diligently on teaching me through my research.

I wish I had known my friend at "The Christ-Blessed Nest" back then. Because this weekend, she brought over a gift for my boy and girl that made me want to jump up and down (except no one wants to see a full-term pregnant woman do that).

She has developed a chart that displays the nine qualities of the Fruit of the Spirit in a format similar to the chore charts and responsibility charts available for young kids at most teaching supply stores, etc. Except this one.... oh, I can't even do it justice, it's so wonderful!



I would love for you to go to her etsy site (click HERE... click on the 4th image with all the magnets on the board...recognize those names?!?!) and take a look for yourself.

I rolled out the chart with Drew last night and it was an absolutely precious time. We sat on the tile floor of the kitchen, in front of his chart, and talked about Love, Joy, Peace, etc. We then read over all the "action tags" and I explained how each one represented some way he could act more like Jesus.

You can imagine my delight, when, later on during his bath he looked up at me and said, "Mommy! You are the nicest Mommy in the whole world and I love you!" After he was cleaned up and dressed in his pj's, I took him back over to the chart and let him put the "Give a compliment" magnet in his square.

One of my favorite tags says, "Share Jesus". And I loved the opportunity to explain what that meant to Drew. He claims now that it's his favorite magnet and he wants to put one up every day in his chart. Praise God!

I am in love with this tangible way to teach my child(ren) what God starts to do in a person's life when they put their trust in Him.

Like my friend's instructions point out, we are not able to become proficient at these nine qualities of our own volition. It's God in us. It's His refining. It's His Spirit's working to make us more like Him.

This is just such a precious way to recognize the qualities and give our children a deeper understanding of what they look like practically, lived out in our daily lives.

So, go on over and check out not only the chart, but some of her other wonderfully creative items that are sure to bless YOUR nest!

Inquiring Minds Want to Know...

Humbling?
Challenging?
Sobering?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes indeed!

Parenting is all these and more, especially when your preschooler begins asking you questions that seem to require you to obtain a theology degree before answering.

This has been the case for us over the course of several conversations recently.

In the car on the way to school one morning:
We were listening to the radio when that song by tobymac came on (the lyrics include, "I don't wanna gain the whole world and lose my soul"). I was singing along, and so was Drew from the backseat, when he piped up,
"Mommy - are they saying, 'I don't wanna gain the whole world and lose my sword?'".

No, buddy.. SOUL. I don't wanna lose my SOUL.

"Oh. O.k." pause... "Hey Mom? What's a soul?"


A few days later:
"Mommy... I know a new verse. Genesis 1:1. God made the heavens. And God made the earth. And he made the birds and the people and all the things. And then He rested on the 7th day."

Very good. That's right, bud.

"But Mommy. I don't think that's right. Because God doesn't rest. He doesn't sleep. He doesn't need to close His eyes. He never stops watching us, right???!!!"

He was adamant, and very concerned. Already he'd found a discrepancy that he couldn't resolve in his mind. I have taught him over and over, especially at bedtime or scary, anxious times that God is ALWAYS with him, wherever he goes. That he watches him while he sleeps. That God is always vigilant, mindful of him. And in learning about the creation of the earth, he now has visions of God laying down on the job... taking a nap... closing those Almighty, watchful eyes. And he needed an explanation for the discrepancy.

The very next night?
I was telling him the story of Adam & Eve. Which, by the way, is a pretty serious story once you get into the details. (Perhaps I need to use the Storybook Picture Bible a little more often to ensure my re-telling is age-appropriate.) But, there we were, talking about Adam and Eve and the beautiful garden, and how God had given them charge over the land. And God told them not to eat the fruit from one tree, but that Adam and Eve made a bad choice and ate that fruit and sinned.

"Why did they do that?"
Because they made a bad choice, honey.
"Why didn't God want them to eat from that tree?"
Because God knew there would be consequences, and He wanted them to listen and obey.
"What if Adam and Eve just didn't hear God tell them not to eat the fruit?"
They heard him, sweetie. They did.
"How? How did they hear God?"
Because He talked to them.
"With a real voice?"

It was only then that I realized the true concern behind his line of questioning. For my four year old has not heard the audible, booming voice of God and thought that, perhaps, this was the problem for Adam & Eve as well.

So, in the past few weeks, I have had the "opportunity" to explain the difference between a heart and a soul; the concept of God resting (as an example to us) yet being ever-mindful, ever-vigilant; and the many ways we can hear the voice of God.

God is so gracious. With the promise that He'll give me wisdom when I ask for it (James 1:5), I'm not as overwhelmed by the charge I have been given with this precocious child. I will not have all the answers for him, but I trust that God will use me to guide him.

And that He'll speak to this child Himself. Whether it's with a booming audible voice or a quiet whisper to that little soul.

Tell me... what are some of the questions your little ones have asked you that left you feeling like you needed to get your ph.D.?

the Sub-plot

So, I spent a post detailing my latest bout with false labor contractions, but only alluded to the sub-plot of the entire evening. You know, the "other" story. The one that was playing out while I was packing my bags for the hospital.

You see, my poor, sweet hubby had come down with major flu-like symptoms a day or so before my contractions took center-stage and by Thursday, he was downright miserable. So, against my better judgment, I heard myself telling him to go ahead and take some nighttime cold relief medicine and get some rest.

About an hour after my pharmaceutical advice (and the pill) was taken, my labor began to get intense. I called a friend to explain what was going on, and we just started laughing, because all I could think about was this:



Mercy me. I'm so grateful that Daddy didn't have to miss out on his daughter's birth, because when I got home from work to pick up my suitcase and a few essentials, he was a dead-ringer for Steve Martin.

So, I drove myself to the hospital, checked-in, was unceremoniously sent home, and we avoided an exact replay of the classic "sleeping pill, wife goes into labor" plotline.

Which is good. I'd hate to be cliche'.

Hanging on to my sanity by 1 cm...

That could all change at any moment. Because that one centimeter may just send me over the edge, depending on how stubborn it decides to be.

So... let's see, since my last update, I finally made a decision to call my doctor and discuss the little issue of all those contractions. I wasn't optimistic. After all, I'd been watching a clock since 5am, and still wasn't feel much discomfort or pain. But the tightening was getting harder to ignore, so on my doctor's advice, I set out for the hospital yesterday afternoon.

I arrived, checked in, and got all hooked up to the monitors and machines. And here is what I learned over the next 30 minutes:

1. I was having contractions every 3-4 minutes
2. They were consistent and getting stronger.
3. I was also running a slight fever of 99.5 ("Oh, my hubby is sick" I informed the nurse)
4. I was only 1 cm dilated.

The nurse left armed with that information and called my doctor. She came back in 20 minutes later. "We're going to let you go home."

OK... I was prepared for that. After all, I was only 1 cm dilated, and I have done this before. I knew that the bulk of the marathon still lay ahead of me. I began to climb out of the bed when she started giving me instructions.

"YOu did the right thing by coming in tonight. And please come back if you experience any of the following:
1. Contractions that occur less than 5 minutes apart
2. Contractions that increase in intensity
3. or if you start to run a fever."

I just looked at her and said, "So.. would you like me to walk to the elevator and come right back? Because you just informed me that I am well-past every symptom you have told me to come back to the hospital for..."

Her only response was, "Yes, but you're only 1 cm."

O.K. Thank you...

I have to say that I hoped I would be in a position of experience going into my second child's birth. Knowing firsthand what childbirth is like, I have rested in the knowledge that this time around, at least I knew what was coming.

But this morning, I'm at a loss. I have no clue when to call my doctor or when to go to the hospital. I am a novice all over again.

But in her defense, the nurse was right after all. Sometime around midnight, the contractions (which had intensified to the point I could not breathe through them), just stopped. I fell into a deep slumber (well, besides the 4 times I awoke to go to the bathroom) and woke up this morning with enough reserves to get through at least another day.

So, like my Facebook status reads:
"False Labor = 2; Mom 2 Drew = 0... Well-played contractions... well-played."